THE OLD YORK BAR AND GRILL- TORONTO . . . 7:30 p.m.

Steve Papadopoulus chose the Old York Bar and Grill because it is just a few blocks from the studio he lives in and he enjoys the company of the artists that work there.  He is also a fan of the microbrews served.  Steve considered cooking for me, but his studio is under renovations and he is trying to put as much time as he can into building his portfolio for his masters application.  I ordered the Falafel Burger and he ordered the Steak with Portabella Mushrooms as recommended by the server.  The food is good and so is the service. Steve is appreciative given the fact that he works as a bartender to pay for his art.

THE CONVERSATION

When Steve is talking about art, his eyes get bigger and he stares so intently it is hard to look away. Hanging in his studio, it is also his likeness he painted into the middle of a small yellow canvas grasping at a tie and the back of his own shirt, head tucked. His more recent work is inspired by machines and their functionality. He lives and works amidst his work in the studio that he likens to his mind.  He says, “I’m reorganizing my mind as I reorganize that studio.”

Steve has no difficulty throwing out old work as he renovates, although there are some pieces he does not want to sell to just anyone and others he would not sell at all. He also would not trade living in the city. “It’s a lot of people in a smaller place from everywhere. It’s a larger community. If you’re somewhere else you get stale. The city creates a pace.”

Steve lives surrounded by his art so that he can work when he wants to. He makes an effort to log the time he spends but admits that he occasionally loses the log book.  He explains, “For me there’s always something I want to draw or paint but what I want to say can take longer. As you get older you need more of a purpose of why you are doing it. I don’t doodle. I don’t have sketch books and fill them up. They are full of notes and some pictures. I do it to construct ideas. Mine are more like journalists’ notepads.”

He starts with an idea and then he figures out how to execute it.  He says, “It’s conceptual. I’m becoming a conceptual artist as I learn. I like to create new ideas. I like to figure out new ideas. It’s just a constant learning process. If I have to sculpt something, I’ll sculpt to get the message across. You have to use the right tools to create the idea.”

He believes “artists have to take responsibility to create something that no one else sees, something different, or tell a story just to show things in a different light or a different perspective. I like for me to be able to think and then pass that thinking on to someone else. I don’t like to just do work that’s cool or nice to look at. I know what I am capable of.”

Steve says he could talk for hours about the frustrations of being an artist, but it is clear that the frustration comes from his love of art and learning.   He says, “Frustration is what am I going to do with my work? Frustration is I want more time to work on my work. Frustration is realizing the work I’m doing is not the work I want to be doing. It’s the time you spend.”

He returns again and again to his frustration with the commercialization of art. “People, especially in North America, do not appreciate the arts. They appreciate it in terms of a value, as investing. It’s just too market driven here. It’s not about how much you sell. It’s about where can I see your work? Where can I read about it and learn about it?”

“In Europe, art is looked on as a true skill. It’s mastery. They never asked me have you sold? They said can I write your name down to remember just in case? It’s a different appreciation. I just want to try different venues just to see, so I’m not too judgmental. I want to make a critical evaluation.”

So Steve’s current work is focused on preparing a portfolio to submit as an application to a masters program in Fine Arts. He says, “I’ve realized a lot of things. I’m not ready. I will be. Now I want to get ready.  Now is the point where I have to create the work, have the shows, get into the reality of it all. It is reality that I am not ready.” He is quick to add, “I was never lying to myself. I was honest about wanting to go. I want to do something that maybe I can’t do yet. I will do it. I don’t ever give up.”

Steve can admit that he is very hard on himself and he sees a masters program as a way to redeem himself for his lack of focus during his undergraduate years. He says, “I have to do it for myself. I don’t want to just be accepted. I want to have an agenda. I want to have a plan.”

In his youth, he had planned to be a graphic artist or an illustrator in order to make money.  Then he traveled. He says, “I saw all of the masters. That was crazy.  The galleries were packed. That was the greatest. They were there to see dead artists’ work. Maybe that will happen, maybe it won’t. It’s something to look forward to. There’s life after death.”

While he admits it is almost impossible to create something that has never been done before, he takes pleasure in developing his own ideas even if he will later learn that someone else was working on the same idea elsewhere. He laughs, “I don’t have an audience. I have a cat. It can be so hard when no one is coming to look at my work. I’m like, ‘is it good’? You stare at it for so long. You need to take a few steps back.

No matter where Steve is standing, he sees art. He says, “If we’re going to do the arts we should acknowledge an open mind more. Art in general is the most important thing in society. It’s the best way of communicating, real communication.” He advises people, “Just look. Just be interested.”

Ultimately he says, “I do what I do because I want to and if I don’t I won’t sleep at night.” Soon he will spends the nights he is not up creating sleeping in a bed that has been elevated to accommodate even more work space in his studio.  He would not have it any other way, winking that that art is created from “whatever is able to burn the match.” And just like that he is out the door for a cigarette.  It is all about the composition and how you frame it.

THE DESSERT

I was eager to talk to Steve because a number of people have talked with me about the need to add more graphics to my posts.  I can certainly make many excuses as to why I have not done so yet.  Although people are curious to see images of the people I eat with, many do not even want their names used, never mind their pictures. I have wondered about photographing the food we eat and the tables we sit at.  I have even thought about publishing other people’s photographs and artwork as a part of each post.  I am still thinking.

If nothing else, I will probably need to learn photography, which is an exciting prospect I am approaching with more caution than is usually characteristic.  My brief foray into coding for this website is a still-stinging reminder that it takes more than good intentions to master a new skill.  Steve has renewed my drive by reminding me that the form of communication must serve the ideas being conveyed.  And we must push our skills as far as our thinking can take us.

First and foremost I do want to focus on the writing. At Steve’s suggestion, I have revised the first section as an experiment in setting a better scene.  This experimentation will need to continue to evolve. I will need a new vocabulary to discuss food more knowledgably or a different perspective to more skillfully blend the food offerings with the ideas of the person serving it.  Perhaps this will be a better way of expressing my enormous gratitude for all that my hosts are offering.